I read these types of stories a lot lately. Seems many of us lose family or friends.
whatnext.com by GregP_WN
You're diagnosed with cancer, you call a few friends and give them the heartbreaking news, they promise to be there, just tell them what you need. Fast forward a few months and see who's there now. Many of them aren't around, or are very distanced and you may even have a new circle of friends that include people that weren't friends before cancer.
Where Are All My Friends
A cancer diagnosis is devastating news, for you, your family and your friends and many people just can't handle it.
Is it your fault? NO!! Most people mean well and don't mean to hurt your feelings, they are sometimes overwhelmed by the whole "cancer thing" and can't cope with you having cancer. Or maybe they just can't handle cancer. There are many reasons they might have bailed, here are a few:
1) Sometimes people don't know how to react - I actually did my senior seminar paper partially addressing this issue, influenced additionally with my own personal experience, and I found that some people just react in that way because they don't know how else to react to the situation. This doesn't mean that they don't care, it is just their way of dealing with the issue. In the same way, certain people might react in a completely opposite manner because of the same thing. Just try to understand that especially for those who are closest to you, will react in certain ways. This does not mean they do not care, but their body or mind may react in a certain way from something which -- frankly -- is a lot to process for them, too. I'm not saying those individuals will not eventually come around; I would suggest to perhaps give them a bit of space and then reach out when you think they are ready to reconnect. Thoraxe23
2) Some people just can't deal - Sad but true. Although I still have hope for one of my friends who has stayed away because I really do think that we are good friends. It's just that she can't deal with this on so many levels. Sue_2015
3) Sometimes people just don't have the extra time to be there - I have found the same thing. I have found that some people I thought would really be there don't seem to have the time anymore. It is sad and hurtful. Especially when some of them are ones i thought were my closest friends. I also found people that I thought were just aquaintance ended up being true friends. I also made some new friends. I guess when the chips are down you really do find out who your true friends are.
4) People just don't know what to say, so they say nothing - I have experienced the same reaction. I know that many people were thinking of me but just didn't know what to say - so they chose to say nothing. Sadly, I know I have done the same to others in the past when they had gone through something even though I thought of them and wished them well often.But unless that is conveyed, it is not known.
I Don't Know What To Say
5) They don't know how to handle it, and don't want to upset you - People do treat you differently though. I think it is because sometimes they just don't know how to respond. It makes cancer 'real' to them and that's scary. They don't want to upset you so they don't always know what to say or do. Cancer is hard on everyone. - Alimccalli
6) It's a difficult emotional situation - It is a difficult situation emotionally, but you can't see into other people's hearts. Maybe people are scared. Maybe they don't know what to do. Maybe they feel that you should be reaching out more to them. It is hard to understand unless you have actually gone through it. - Jalemans
7) It makes them think about their own mortality, and they don't want to - Some people can't handle any illness and are so afraid they could get it too and don't want to think about it or their mortality. - EstherJ
8) Spouses and close relatives may not be able to deal with the fact that you may die - I can relate. mine left in a different way. he couldn't face the fact that i may die and took to the bottle - Isnoop
9) People feel inadequate and unable to do anything about your situation - I know what you mean I went through the same thing People are weirded out by cancer They mean well but they feel totally awkward and inadequate They simply dont know what to say Plus patients are different Some people want everyone to pretend that nothing is going on while others want the support Give them some cues. You bring it up. Tell them "I am stressed today thinking about my cancer and the future, how about we doing something distracting?" This tells them the topic is not off limits but doesn't beg them for sympathy Good luck I am always jealous when i read posts from caregivers I could have used a caregiver! - Zubsha
The take home message for this situation is to just remember, it's not your fault. You may make some of these situations better by explaining your situation to them and letting them know you understand, and explain what they can do to help you. You might be able to stop some of these situations before they get started.
Wednesday, 30 March 2016
Monday, 28 March 2016
My Book Currently in the top 10
My book is available as an e=book or paperback on Amazon.com Fighting The Storm - My Breast Cancer Journey
http://www.amazon.com/Fighting-Storm-Breast-Cancer-Journey-ebook/dp/B017UTFFRQ/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1453013528&sr=1-1&keywords=fighting+the+storm
http://www.amazon.com/Fighting-Storm-Breast-Cancer-Journey-ebook/dp/B017UTFFRQ/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1453013528&sr=1-1&keywords=fighting+the+storm
A great read
5 Rarely Discussed Breast Cancer Early Warning Signs
By Ty Bollinger
Breast-Cancer-Early-Warning-Signs-1-new
Breast cancer awareness month has just gotten underway, which means the Great Pink Push is being unleashed. The cancer industry will shift into overdrive, urging women everywhere to get their mammogram screenings as they beg for cash donations for breast cancer research. All the while providing little in the way of practical preventative tips and tools that women can use to avoid this common form of cancer.
As an informed, health-savvy individual, you probably want to know what you need to look for right now in order to nip breast cancer in the bud. Instead of trying to deal with it after you’ve already been diagnosed – which hopefully will never happen! We’ve compiled a list of five early warning breast cancer signs, most of which are rarely talked about in the media. Learn these signs as part of your preventative arsenal to stay ahead of the game.
Don’t Just Look for Breast Lumps
The most common way that conventional doctors look for breast cancer in women is to identify lumps in the breast. They most often do this with mammogram x-rays. This offer physicians a basic roadmap for navigating the terrain of breast tissue, allowing them to pinpoint any lumps, masses, or other questionable abnormalities that might point to a malignancy.
But mammograms can be a potential cause of cancer due to the ionizing radiation they send into breast tissue. They also aren’t accurate 100 percent of the time, despite what you may have been told. Lumps and masses in breast tissue can be either benign (harmless) or malignant (harmful), and mammograms don’t differentiate between the two. This often leads to false diagnoses and unnecessary treatments with chemotherapy and radiation.
A better option, if you choose to undergo routine cancer screenings, is thermography. This unique screening method allows doctors to not only look for unusual lumps or growths, but also identify whether or not angiogenesis is taking place within the breast tissue.
A lot of health experts like to talk about breast cancer as something that results from “bad genetics,” being passed down from mothers to their daughters. This implies that breast cancer can’t be avoided and occurs as an unfortunate “luck of the draw” type scenario. And depending on the type of breast cancer they’re talking about, there may be some merit to this popular theory.
But most types of breast cancer are a result of environment, diet, and lifestyle, all of which dictate how a woman’s endocrine system produces and balances hormones. In other words, hormone imbalance plays a much greater role in determining breast cancer risk than many people think. Thermography can help qualified physicians determine whether or not a woman has an elevated breast cancer risk due to this often overlooked early indicator.breast-cancer-warning-signs
Know the Breast Cancer Signs
Every woman’s body has a unique ebb and flow, and getting in tune with your own personal rhythm is invaluable for staying healthy. Paying close attention to any unusual changes that might be occurring, especially within breast tissue, is critical to avoid breast cancer.
If you feel any unusual aches or pains in your breast, including occasional throbbing, pain, or even fluctuating discomfort, talk to your doctor. Many women assume that only an isolated lump with localized pain suggests the presence of breast cancer. The truth is that breast cancer can manifest as “scattered, seed-like” tumors that, in some cases, spread like small tentacles throughout breast tissue.
Experts from MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston warn that breast cancer often shows up without the classic lump, showing symptoms such as swelling and irritation, dimpling, nipple discharge beyond normal lactation, nipple inversion, and/or a thickening and reddening of skin around the nipple.
“There are breast cancers that present as half a lump or there may be no lump at all,” says Dr. Naoto Ueno, chief of Translational Breast Cancer Research at the Center, as quoted by CBS News. “It could just be a strange-looking skin appearance or skin being red or dimpled.”
Just be sure to look for patterns of change or any new and unusual symptoms that occur outside the norm. Occasional pain may not be indicative of breast cancer, but persistent itching, for instance, could point to fluid buildup, poor lymph function, or your body trying to create new blood vessels for breast tumors.
Can Back Pain Indicate Breast Tumor Development?
Upper back pain that feels as though it’s coming from deep within the bones may be an early sign of breast cancer. But don’t assume that every occasional bout of soreness or back pain means you’re becoming the next statistic! Chronic back pain that doesn’t relent with stretching, chiropractic, or other means may be a sign that breast cancer tumors are forming.
Sometimes when tumors are developing in a woman’s breast, they put pressure on the ribs and spine causing new found and persistent pain. You need to be aware of any changes that occur in your spinal column, upper back, and even neck. Talk to your doctor if you feel as though the pain you’re experiencing is unusually pronounced and marked by pressure from a possible internal growth.
Nutrient Deficiency and Breast Cancer
If you’re not getting enough of the right nutrients in your diet, including vitamin D and iodine, your risk of developing breast cancer is already elevated. Nutrient deficiency is endemic in the West. Many people don’t realize that what they’re not eating is increasingly their likelihood of developing chronic health conditions such as breast cancer.
Nearly 75% of the adult “healthy” population is deficient in iodine, which has been shown to help ward off cancer cells in the breast and elsewhere throughout the body. Vitamin D is another risk factor in breast cancer. A 2012 study published in the Indian Journal of Endocrinology and Metabolism revealed that low vitamin D levels are a hallmark in women with breast cancer. Other studies show similar findings.
A good rule of thumb in today’s nutrient-depleted world is to supplement with these and other cancer-fighting nutrients such as selenium and zinc. You may also wish to consult with a trained naturopath or integrative doctor. They can help you identify any specific nutrient deficiencies you might have and help you optimize your unique biological “terrain” for best breast cancer prevention. https://thetruthaboutcancer.com/5-early-warning-breast-cancer-signs/
By Ty Bollinger
Breast-Cancer-Early-Warning-Signs-1-new
Breast cancer awareness month has just gotten underway, which means the Great Pink Push is being unleashed. The cancer industry will shift into overdrive, urging women everywhere to get their mammogram screenings as they beg for cash donations for breast cancer research. All the while providing little in the way of practical preventative tips and tools that women can use to avoid this common form of cancer.
As an informed, health-savvy individual, you probably want to know what you need to look for right now in order to nip breast cancer in the bud. Instead of trying to deal with it after you’ve already been diagnosed – which hopefully will never happen! We’ve compiled a list of five early warning breast cancer signs, most of which are rarely talked about in the media. Learn these signs as part of your preventative arsenal to stay ahead of the game.
Don’t Just Look for Breast Lumps
The most common way that conventional doctors look for breast cancer in women is to identify lumps in the breast. They most often do this with mammogram x-rays. This offer physicians a basic roadmap for navigating the terrain of breast tissue, allowing them to pinpoint any lumps, masses, or other questionable abnormalities that might point to a malignancy.
But mammograms can be a potential cause of cancer due to the ionizing radiation they send into breast tissue. They also aren’t accurate 100 percent of the time, despite what you may have been told. Lumps and masses in breast tissue can be either benign (harmless) or malignant (harmful), and mammograms don’t differentiate between the two. This often leads to false diagnoses and unnecessary treatments with chemotherapy and radiation.
A better option, if you choose to undergo routine cancer screenings, is thermography. This unique screening method allows doctors to not only look for unusual lumps or growths, but also identify whether or not angiogenesis is taking place within the breast tissue.
A lot of health experts like to talk about breast cancer as something that results from “bad genetics,” being passed down from mothers to their daughters. This implies that breast cancer can’t be avoided and occurs as an unfortunate “luck of the draw” type scenario. And depending on the type of breast cancer they’re talking about, there may be some merit to this popular theory.
But most types of breast cancer are a result of environment, diet, and lifestyle, all of which dictate how a woman’s endocrine system produces and balances hormones. In other words, hormone imbalance plays a much greater role in determining breast cancer risk than many people think. Thermography can help qualified physicians determine whether or not a woman has an elevated breast cancer risk due to this often overlooked early indicator.breast-cancer-warning-signs
Know the Breast Cancer Signs
Every woman’s body has a unique ebb and flow, and getting in tune with your own personal rhythm is invaluable for staying healthy. Paying close attention to any unusual changes that might be occurring, especially within breast tissue, is critical to avoid breast cancer.
If you feel any unusual aches or pains in your breast, including occasional throbbing, pain, or even fluctuating discomfort, talk to your doctor. Many women assume that only an isolated lump with localized pain suggests the presence of breast cancer. The truth is that breast cancer can manifest as “scattered, seed-like” tumors that, in some cases, spread like small tentacles throughout breast tissue.
Experts from MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston warn that breast cancer often shows up without the classic lump, showing symptoms such as swelling and irritation, dimpling, nipple discharge beyond normal lactation, nipple inversion, and/or a thickening and reddening of skin around the nipple.
“There are breast cancers that present as half a lump or there may be no lump at all,” says Dr. Naoto Ueno, chief of Translational Breast Cancer Research at the Center, as quoted by CBS News. “It could just be a strange-looking skin appearance or skin being red or dimpled.”
Just be sure to look for patterns of change or any new and unusual symptoms that occur outside the norm. Occasional pain may not be indicative of breast cancer, but persistent itching, for instance, could point to fluid buildup, poor lymph function, or your body trying to create new blood vessels for breast tumors.
Can Back Pain Indicate Breast Tumor Development?
Upper back pain that feels as though it’s coming from deep within the bones may be an early sign of breast cancer. But don’t assume that every occasional bout of soreness or back pain means you’re becoming the next statistic! Chronic back pain that doesn’t relent with stretching, chiropractic, or other means may be a sign that breast cancer tumors are forming.
Sometimes when tumors are developing in a woman’s breast, they put pressure on the ribs and spine causing new found and persistent pain. You need to be aware of any changes that occur in your spinal column, upper back, and even neck. Talk to your doctor if you feel as though the pain you’re experiencing is unusually pronounced and marked by pressure from a possible internal growth.
Nutrient Deficiency and Breast Cancer
If you’re not getting enough of the right nutrients in your diet, including vitamin D and iodine, your risk of developing breast cancer is already elevated. Nutrient deficiency is endemic in the West. Many people don’t realize that what they’re not eating is increasingly their likelihood of developing chronic health conditions such as breast cancer.
Nearly 75% of the adult “healthy” population is deficient in iodine, which has been shown to help ward off cancer cells in the breast and elsewhere throughout the body. Vitamin D is another risk factor in breast cancer. A 2012 study published in the Indian Journal of Endocrinology and Metabolism revealed that low vitamin D levels are a hallmark in women with breast cancer. Other studies show similar findings.
A good rule of thumb in today’s nutrient-depleted world is to supplement with these and other cancer-fighting nutrients such as selenium and zinc. You may also wish to consult with a trained naturopath or integrative doctor. They can help you identify any specific nutrient deficiencies you might have and help you optimize your unique biological “terrain” for best breast cancer prevention. https://thetruthaboutcancer.com/5-early-warning-breast-cancer-signs/
Saturday, 26 March 2016
Thursday, 24 March 2016
My Breast Cancer Journey
Updated to include my most recent, second diagnosis. Available as an e-reader and shortly will be available in paperback. Purchase a copy at Amazon.
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